Tuesday, 28 December 2010

Mommy, WOW! I'm a big girl now!

I'm so glad to have new followers who are being challenged by Suzi!!  She is truly INSPIRING people to take control of their lives!  And I don't mean in the freakish way that I am at all. :)

True to form, I took the dog on several 10 minutes walks yesterday, and today I FINALLY managed to get back into the gym.  I know it's by sheer luck and food control that I've consistently showed losses this month because it certainly wasn't done with exercise.  I went after work today and did the usual 30 minute circuit.  I'm still not feeling totally out of my funk.  I didn't enjoy the workout like I did before.  I'm feeling bored with it.  Which, is a problem seeing as I signed a year-long membership just 3 months ago.  So, I'm going to have to find some exciting activity to do in between days.  Stay tuned...

I think I've got a case of hundreditis.  I can't decided if it's actually a bad thing or not.  I am reveling in the fact that I've lost 100 lbs.  I know that I still have almost 70 left to lose before I reach a healthy weight, but I am letting myself feel accomplished over losing 100 lbs.  Apparently with a bit of laziness in the exercise department.  *shrug*  I suppose that just goes to show that even after a year of healthy habits- it's still VERY easy to get lax and fall back into living a stagnant life.

I read somewhere that exercise is 60% heart, 30% mind, and 10% body.  I'm struggling with that right now.  That whole thing about doing shit you hate even though you know you're just gonna hate it "will power," I've never been good at.  I'm really terrible at convincing myself do things I don't really want to do.  I'm hoping that I will eventually mature more into this idea, but as it is now, I generally choose NOT to do things when my heart is not into it.  But, this time, I'm not willing to lose any progress.  The loitering at this activity level inevitably will bring me to a plateau, I'm sure.  So this will be a new education for me.  I guess I'll just consider it "practice" for the future.  Mommy, WOW!  I'm a big girl now!

Sunday, 26 December 2010

Christmas Past and Christmas Future

I hope you all had a wonderful Holiday!  I certainly, especially when I came home and loaded the pictures!!
Christmas 2010 on the left, Christmas 2009 on the right!
Such a strong motivator to see such a difference in my size and shape!  That being said, I'm going to redouble my efforts and head into the New Year with a loss!  Suzi is challenging that we each make sure we get in 10 minutes of activity every day.  Sounds easy, I mean I do my best to exercise a few times a week right now for 30 minutes or more.  But that's not EVERY day.  This week, it will be! :)

My family is really so supportive of me and for Christmas I received quite a few kitchen gadgets and utensils, a sushi kit and a couple vegetarian cookbooks!  (Again, I'm not a vegetarian, I'm just eating WAAAaaay less meat than I used to.)  I'm going to be spending a lot of time in the kitchen during 2011.  Would any of you be interest in food porn?  Would you like me to post the recipes I try?  Let me know...

Glad you loved my lunch box!  I LOVE it, too!!  I've eaten out of it twice now and it really feels like stepping back into my childhood- eating my lunch out of the little divided compartments of my lunch tray.  But, this time, I'm the kid everyone wants to trade with! =D  It's very cool!

Friday, 24 December 2010

Planet Box

Packed my Planet Box today - even though I only opened it again once I reached my table. :)

PB&J Sandwich, broccoli florets, carrot sticks, grapes, 1T ranch dressing.

I've spent most of today tidying up the house.  It's been feeling rather cluttered cozy in my home lately.  I'm under quite a bit of school stress right now and my lack of extra time was really beginning to show up around here.  But, it's all looking much better now, which makes me feel better, and now I'm looking forward to my families Christmas Eve tradition of a late night movie viewing at the theater!  A still have a few gifts to wrap, and I'm responisble for the veggie sides for dinner tomorrow, so I've got a bit of prep for that today also.  Oh yeah...and there's the ever present HEAPING pile of school work to do...ugh.  But the rest will be great!  I'm off!

Thursday, 23 December 2010

Merry Christmas!

Usually when I get to work, I walk in and put my things away and go to the kitchen to speak with the children's mother for a moment, take over the baby, and meet "my" 5-year-old (5YO) at the breakfast table.  Not this morning.  This morning when I got to work (5YO's house), she met on the garage steps into the house vibrating with excitement.  "Nanny!!  It's OUUUURR Christmas today!! (She knows I won't be back at her house until next Tuesday.)  "Nanny!!  I have presents for you!!  She whispers "presents" in that wide-eyed, fake, overly enthusiastic way that Mom's and Nanny's always do to make gifts seem more exciting.  Guilty.  She mimics very well, as all 5-year-olds can.

She knows she is not often allowed to pounce Nanny at the door.  After all, this is the beginning of my work day.  I arrive 10 minutes early most days for the luxury of putting my things away and prepping the morning activities.   I'm certain that this is another reason she's whispering, mother is still "on-duty" and will remind her quickly that she must wait for me at the breakfast table.  But today, I walk in the door, 5YO trailing me in quicksteps, herding me toward my table where I put my things down, Mother sees, but smiles and turns a blind eye.  I reach my table, in view of the gifts she has left for me and begin removing my coat in slow motion, taking extra time to adjust my hair and clothing, zipping my purse up and setting it in the drawer, then forgetting something and going back for it. 

She is dancing in that spastic way kids move; like a cartoon character who sticks their fork in a light socket,  chattering, "Nanny, come and see the gifts on the table.  Do you like the paper?  I made that."  I'm ignoring her, but turn to her finally and say, "I'll meet you at the breakfast table."  She grins and takes off like a jack-rabbit to her place setting.  I detour to her Christmas tree, where I've had gifts for her wrapped since last week.  Gather them up and walk to the dining area and set them on the table.  There are 3, and we are both well aware that they contain her very FAVORITE thing in the. entire. world. Books. 

"Good morning, Nanny!  (Her usual pre-requisite to our first conversation of the day.)  Merry Christmas!!  Open your gift!!"  She is not concerned about the books at this moment in time.  She's a giver.  She's a well-off girl who wants for nothing, so she's more excited to give gifts than receive them.  At my place setting at the breakfast table I find a white paper bag that she has decorated with various glittered Christmas stickers.  She is jumping up and down while sitting in the chair; a feat accomplished only by sheer adrenaline, I'm sure at this point.  Usually I'd make her settle or leave the table, but today I know it would be almost impossible to expect.  Besides, inside, I'm jumping too.  
"Merey Chrismos Nany!  I hop you hav a vere speshl day."
Trust me kid, you have no idea what a privilege it is to have you in my world.  When I let the emotion I have for you swell inside me, I feel like I could explode.  The tears well, my breath sticks, and my heart seizes.  Watching you grow has taught me more about myself than anyone else on this planet has been able to. 

I'm blessed to work in a place where I am held in such high esteem, not only from the children, but also from their mother.  She is my friend.  She gifted me with a Planet Box! complete set and some reusable lunchskins snack bags and I am really excited about it!  I LOVE packing my lunches.  I've ALWAYS done it. 

Merry Christmas to me!  And to all of you, too! :)

Tuesday, 21 December 2010


Thank you all for your help!  The whole crisis was averted when we picked a different restaurant- "Roly Poly."  I think they're a chain restaurant on a much smaller scale than most others.  Do you have one near you?  If not, I'm SOOOO sorry!  If you do, then have a #7 French Twist for me!:)  Roly Poly has a LOT more vegetarian options with much better ingrediants than Subway.  And a good sized list of lower calorie options, so it fit easily into my diet.  I was excited to eat their food!  I'm not trying to endorse or anything, just my humble opinion. 

Anyway, beyond the food aspect of my day, I had a great time with the kids' at our holiday event.  It's wonderful getting to watch Christmas from a child's perspective.  Everything is so magical!  I got lots of compliments from the mothers' about my weight loss.  And, I even got in some exercise playing freeze tag with a gaggle of 3-5 year olds while wearing a 25lbs 6 month old. :) 

Tomorrow is cookie making and decoarting with "my" 5 year old.  And, funny enough, I'll probably be wearing the 30lbs'er again:)  Luckily, I take my job very seriously, and I often talk to her about proper nutrition.  Tomorrow as we decorate I'm going to talk to her about "moderation" and what that means.  While she eats a relatively healthy diet, she does tend to get stuck on her "favorites."  So we will talk about why it is important to eat every color in the rainbow (a lesson plan from two weeks ago) in fruits and vegetables, and everything else should be in "moderation."

Thanks for your help!

Monday, 20 December 2010

Putting You To Work

Well HOT DAMN!!  12 whole followers!!  Not even close to as many as Katie J (she just hit 400!) but I'm so greatful for her shout out to come See C. Evolve!  Thank you!  For those of you who followed her link to me, I'm so happy to have you here!  Welcome.

Now that you're here, I'm going to put you all to work.  I need your opinion.

If you are invited to a lunch out with a group of people who will be ordering food from a fast food chain, kid-friendly restaurant, is it rude to bring your own lunch? 

Tomorrow I'll be out with a group of mothers and their children whose plan is to eat lunch out at Subway and then attend a local holiday event.  I like Subway subs.  But with my attempt to avoid most meat, that basically leaves me with a "Veggie" sub...and to be honest, I'd rather pack and eat a huge bowl of my homemade 16 bean soup and rice.   So would it be rude to bring my own lunch into this restaurant?

What do you think?

Sunday, 19 December 2010

To lose or not to lose?

As you might have noticed, I am a food fanatic.  I always have been and I always will be in some form or another.  Before, my fanaticism was centered around the eating of food.  It's taste, it's texture, the feel of chewing and swallowing and filling up my stomach.  I wanted it cold, room-temperature, and hot.  I wanted it steamed, fried, baked, basted, roasted, boiled, was garlic, with basil, with salt, with pepper and oil and butter and sweet and sour.  I spent all my time thinking of different foods to eat and different ways to eat them and how the would taste and smell and feel.  It was exhausting.

But, now my focus is more around the ingredients themselves.  I want to know what a food is, where it came from, how it's grown, how it fits into the food pyramid, what are it's nutritional benefits.  I want it to be good for my body as a whole, not just my mouth.  It can't just taste good- it has to be good for me.  I no longer work for my food, I make my food work for me. 

Lately it's been cookie central 'round these parts.  Sugar, Peanut butter, Gingerbread, Chocolate-Mint Doozies, and Peppermint Crisscross cookies.  So far I've done relatively well with enjoying them in moderation.  I count one or two sweets a day into my PointsPlus trakker, but there have been times I know that I've succumbed to the BLT's (bite, licks, tastes) that I haven't tracked.  Bites of my husband's store-bought pizza that he annoying keeps on the counter all afternoon for me to walk by that haven't been tracked.  Gingerbread angel-heads that broke off mid-frosting, that were never seen or heard from again.  I've been lucky lately.  With PointsPlus starting and throwing my body for a new weight-losing loop, I've lost weight.  But, I know that won't continue if I keep sneaking bits and crumbs here and there.  Even though I've made these cookies with wholesome ingredients, they do still have calories.  They add up. 

Now I've just got to get on that whole exercising bandwagon again.  *sigh*  I'm determined to put in some activity tomorrow.  My funk doesn't seem to be clearing on it's own- so I'm just going to have to kick it out on it's ass.  I haven't decided what activity I'm going to participate in yet, but some where small inside me I'm looking forward to breathing hard for 30-45 minutes.  Sound weird?  Trust me, I know.  My motivation is that if I want to enjoy the Holiday food-stivities (and I do, I REALLY do!) I'm going to have to put in extra work to burn off the extra calories.  It's simple science!

At my meeting yesterday, the meeting leader mentioned we should ask begin self talk about what we expected of ourselves coming into the new year.  Would we expect to lose, maintain, or gain weight over the holidays?  I'm trying to decide that today.  I certainly do not want to gain.  But, I've worked really hard on consistently reducing my caloric intake this year.  I have a notion that too much restriction over the holidays for me will be very difficult and stressful.  Maintenance for the next two weeks sounds much better.  But is that just me making excuses?  I can't decide...

Saturday, 18 December 2010

100lbs! Top 7 Major Things

My weigh-in was today and I have now officially lost 104.4 lbs!  So, I thought I share with you all a few things that I feel helped to get me here!  So many things have changed.  But, then I realized that, no, it really only seems that way because of how changing has made me feel.  So I just listed the 7 major things that have changed for me this year. 

Top 10  7 Major Things
(that have helped me lose 100lbs)
1.  Never before in my life have I ever eaten so many fruits and vegetables.  Today I bought the following in hopes I won't have to return to the grocery store until after Christmas (9 days or so.) 
9 bananas, 3 apples, a bag of cranberries, 2 crowns of broccoli, 2 lbs of brussels sprouts, 2 onions, 2 sweet potatoes, a pint of mushrooms- in my fridge, left overs from last week include a bag of carrots, half of an onion, and a box of spinach.

2.  80% of the food I eat are made from fresh ingredients that I picked on my own and then prepared with my own hands in my own kitchen.  Of the other 20%- half of that is from prepared, frozen foods from brands I trust, and the other half is incidentals and meals from a restaurant.  I am aware of the start-to-finish process of what I consume in 90% of my diet.  And, often enough I would consider it 100% awareness because I often simply choose not to consume what I now refer to as "mystery edibles."

3.  I can't remember the last time I've eaten hamburger or red meat in general.  In fact, I can't remember the last time I've eaten any form of land animal other than eggs.  I remember when I first started WW, as soon as my weigh in and meeting let out, I would go celebrate by treating myself to a 24pt Big Mac and 4pt small fry.  Now I don't go to McDonald's at all because the only "meatless" semi-healthy thing on the menu are really crappy iceberg lettuce salads and even the dressing sucks. 

4.  I have participated in 5 different exercise-related activities.  Water aerobics, bike riding, walking my first 5K, joining Curves, and now I've begun the C25K running program.  I don't love every minute of it, but I continue to push myself and it's a wonderful thing to be able to feel impressed with yourself.

5.  I have gone from a snug 3X (26-28) shirt to a L (18/20) shirt.  I have gone from a size 30 jeans down to a size 20.  I'm down 3 bra sizes and 2 cups sizes, 2 sizes in underwear, 2.5 ring sizes, down a shoe size.  From wearing earrings I can tell that even my earlobes have lost fat.  I can see and feel my collarbones, hip bones, tail bones, ribs, the carpels in my hands and muscle definition all over.  Seeing the results definitely has fueled my motivation.

6.  I'm pretty much a 50/50 mix of my mom and dad when it comes to looks.  It used to be that people mostly told me I looked like my also obese father- now they more often tell me that I look SO much like my healthy, fit mother.  So while noticing the change in my own body is a wonderful feeling, having OTHER people notice my weight loss efforts in all kinds of different ways: priceless.

7.  The relationship with my husband has strengthened.  He didn't dislike the old me, of course, but I think he really does enjoy my new energy and confidence.  We have enjoyed cooking together and going on long walks or bike rides.  My husband is a chef, so it's flattering for him to ask ME for a recipe.  I have outgrown his knowledge on the preparation of healthy, vegetarian ingredients and he has enjoyed many of the recipes I've created this year.

So there you have it.  A bit disorganized, but, that's how I roll.  I still have 60-70lbs to lose until I will be in the "healthy" range for my height and age.  But, I'm already passed the half way point and I'm not in a hurry.  Going to be a fun ride!

Thursday, 16 December 2010

Funky Mojo

Well...crap.  I've lost a bit of my mojo...  I'm still eating on plan, but between me and you, exercise has been pretty much nill for a little over a week. 

I could get you a bunch of reasons:

Busy holiday season?  Yes.

Some MASSIVE school deadlines quickly approaching?  Uh huh.

Cranky-teething-snot filled, head cold suffering  6 month old at work?  Yep, that too.

Rediculously FREEZING temperatures?  Fo RIZZLE! 

Taking a LOT more time on my meal plan now that I have to learn the PointsPlus program?  Absolutely.

But, deep down I know that these are excuses.  I don't know why I'm in a funk.  Can't wait to get out of it...

Sunday, 12 December 2010

Close, but no cigar! (Just cookies)

Weight in was yesterday...but I missed the 100lb mark by 0.2 of a pound.  *gag*  I would have taken my jeans off if the room hadn't had a whole wall of windows showing out to the busy strip mall. LOL  Oh well- next week for sure.  I am kinda bummed though because my mom (who usually comes to the meetings with me) and my meeting leader will be out of town next Saturday.  So, even though I'm sure I'll hit my goal...I won't get to really share it with the two people who have given me the most support.  I'm thinking of bringing them flowers or something when I can, just for being so wonderful and helpful to me this past year.  I really couldn't have done it without them.  Unfortunately, the major holidays end up on Saturdays for the next two weeks after that, so I won't even get to go to my regular meetings.  I'm sad about it.  And a bit anxious.  I think I'll have to go to that "outskirts of town" meeting again. 

Anyway, yesterday was a fun evening of pizza and hot wings (in moderation, of course) and decorating Christmas cookies with my whole family.  (Sorry the picture isn't fabulous, but it's about living in the moment, really!)  Today with be more cookie decorating with my husband and maybe a matinee showing of the new Narnia in 3D!

Thursday, 9 December 2010

I'm BAAAaaaack!!

I've returned home from a trip to visit my sister.  It was an absolute BLAST filled with lots of shopping, sight seeing, errand running, good food and AMAZINGNESS!!  I even exercised...once.  Hmm...well- once is better than non-ce, right?  Right.  If it rhymes, then it must be true... ;o)

I did stay on plan food-wise, so I will still be expecting a loss at my meeting Saturday.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I've hit 100lbs lost at my next weight in.  It's all very exciting.  If I don't manage it...eh...whatever...it'll happen eventually.  Weight loss is just science.  If you eat less and move more, eventually, the caloric deficit will create a weight loss. 

So seriously, I need your help figuring out how to celebrate losing 100lbs without involving food.  I shop at the Goodwill by choice, so a "new outfit" really doesn't excite me.  I'd rather not "waste" money on clothes that will hopefully only fit for a few months.  And, honestly, I'm not to the point where I feel so in love with it that I can "celebrate with exercise."  (Yes, someone actually suggested that to me...  Freak...)  So, please- if you've got anything besides that...tell me!!

OH- and because I promised "before" and "during" photo evidence, one the left was the trip to see my sister in January about 80lbs ago

Also, I can't tell you exactly where or how it came to be (I've been sworn to secrecy), but I actually got to HOLD Chris Martin from Coldplay's GUITAR!!!  It was absolutely FANTASTIC and I will remember it for the rest of my life.  SOOO cool!!  You can see Chris Martin holding the same guitar HERE.  I wonder if Gwyneth Paltrow ever touched it?  Oh man...just the thought makes the excitment swell!

Wednesday, 1 December 2010

Not So Inspirational

Well, I did it.  My first attempt at C25K week 2 was completed today.  I did finish...but I'm not gonna lie, I just BAARELY eeped through the running and I didn't finish my cool down.  I blame my post-work exhaustion for it.  The past few days have been rough for me.  I had a ridiculously nonstop day yesterday that started at 5:30am and didn't end until 9:30pm.  Then, around 2am, my husband decided to toss and turn in his sleep until the ass crack of dawn when I finally poured myself back out of bed to do it all again today, minus the late evening.  So "tired" really doesn't cover the feeling that hit me mid-way through the C25K run this afternoon, if you know what I mean.  Anyway though, I DID finish the running portion and I only cut the cool down period by about 2 minutes.  Can't complain.

The late evening yesterday was because I had to stay on the outskirts of town after work to catch a WW meeting.  I usually go to a Saturday morning meeting at a location close to my home, but I wanted to hear my leader explain the new PointsPlus program to me before I leave to go out of town this weekend, which meant going to a location near my work and about 45 minutes from my home.  I didn't want to drive all the way home after work, just to turn around and head back the way I'd come for the meeting so I decided to hit up the Curves gym on the outskirts of town too, to pass the time.  Apparently (I'm just learning about all the Curves rules) you have to fill out your life story any time you want to go to a Curves that isn't your regular location.  So, it came up that I was just about to lose my 100th pound and the employee there really started gushing over it.  Which is nice, but to be honest, it feels pretty strange to hear people call me an "inspiration."

In my WW meeting each week my leader usually asking me to "say something inspirational" to the rest of the people there before the meeting closes.  I usual fumble over whatever exercise I've done, or food disaster I managed to avoid.  But, now more and more people are using this word..."inspiration."  I don't really get it though because if I were really "so inspirational," wouldn't there be more people around me jumping on the WW band wagon and losing weight?  Cause, that really hasn't happened.  I've invited several people to come to meetings with me who have declined on numerous occasions.  And, the crowd at my meetings is steady in numbers, but not so much consistent in personal attendance.

The way I see it, people really mean to be saying I'm a freak.  I'm an anomaly.  Something that doesn't happen often enough to be taken lightly.  That, I'm okay with.  That, I get.  And, I'd much rather hear whispers now of, "She's lost 100 lbs."  Than the whispers from before of, "She must weight like 400lbs."  I guess what I'm trying to say is that, I'm really not so inspirational and for the first time in my life, I'm enjoying being a freak of nature. :)

I cannot possibly convey in words how RIDICULOUSLY excited I am to see my sister on Friday.  I remember going to see her 80lbs ago and almost worrying myself sick that I would have to buy an extra plane seat because I was so fat.  I didn't have to, but the worry ate at me for days before my departure.  I'm so happy that I'm not even the slightest bit concerned about the seating situation on my flight Friday.  It will probably be the most comfortable flight I've ever been on.  I may even be able to get the tray table all the way into my lap instead of having to rest it on my stomach...  I'll tell you all about it.  I'm sure you want to know...

PS: I got my name on the board at my Curves...'Course I'm stoked.  I've always like being a teacher's pet...