Tuesday, 1 February 2011

Oh Fudge...

It started right after Christmas.  The craving for chocolate came.  I then began to realize that it had probably been months since I'd eaten chocolate.  Vanilla stuff (cake, pudding, cookies, etc.) yes, but not chocolate.  I thought well, if I'm craving it, then I'll just enjoy some in moderation.  The next time I went to the grocery store, I bought a container of Emerald Cocoa Almonds.  I would put 4 into the tiny "treat" compartment of my planet box.  And then...maybe a few in my trail mix...or maybe one while I was standing in front of the pantry.  I counted them all, points wise!  I did track them! 

But the craving didn't stop, and two weeks ago, I bought a box of 100 Calorie packages of Oreo Caksters.  I put ONE cookie (1/3 of a package) the size of my thumbprint into the tiny treat compartment of my planet box.  I've been doing good.  I have not eaten an entire 100 calorie pack in one day.  I recognize that they are not as nutritionally sound as the almonds, they are fake, processed, food- but they fit so cute in my little spot and well, eh...live a little.  ANYWAY...I thought I was doing good- enjoying chocolate in moderation until...

A knock on my door from our WONDERFUL neighbors- bringing us what?  Yep...an ENTIRE. EFFIN. CHOCOLATE. GLORY. CAKE. iced in fudge frosting.  Before you all groan...

I didn't do that poorly.  I had hubby cut me 4 mini portions and put them in the freezer for later enjoyment.  Hubby ate most of the rest...but I did have a few bites...several...okay 10.  I know you might not think that is so disastrous, after all, I did track them in my food planner.  But what surprised me was the draw.  I could NOT STOP eating this cake. 

...Just one bite...
...okay...just 2 bites...I'm gonna track it anyway...
...walk away...
2 hours later
...nom nom nom...I really have to stop eating this...

I did this for three days before hubby managed to polish off the last of it.  Again, it's not the calories consumed that bothered me- it's that I felt out of control.  I knew I didn't REALLY want to eat it- but my mouth just had to have it. 

It didn't help that Hubby has a bad habit of leaving a fork on the cake plate making it WAY too easy to eat before thinking. LOL  I talked to him about it today and he has agreed not to do that anymore.  He thought that by leaving the cake-fork for his later use, he was saving me from washing forks because I nit-pick about saving water by reusing the same glass during the day.  What?  It's green and economical?  So anyway, he promises to not leave any form of eating utensil on the cake plates from now on. :)

The real issue though, is not that Hubby made it easy for me to eat more cake than I meant too, but that I wasn't able to have complete control of my eating when the cake was here.  It really makes me realize that chocolate (especially in cake form) must be a strong trigger food for me.  I know a lot of people have said that, but I didn't realize that I too seem to have a problem sticking to my daily diet when chocolate is around.

I'm going to test it for a month.  I want to see if I can master myself in the presence of chocolate.  If this is a life-long healthy weight journey, there will be times that I will be around quantities of chocolate, God forbid the kid's want cupcakes for a birthday or something.  I need to be able to deliver.  That doesn't me that I should temp myself in anyway.  I will finish the almonds and the oreos that are in my pantry (barring a complete loss of control in the form of a binge which I have not done since I started WW) in moderation.  I will continue to put them in my lunch.  But, at the end of the month I will assess the amount of stress these foods caused me.  If it is too great, then I will be saying good riddance to chocolate. :)

4 comments:

  1. Sounds like you have a great plan! I still have certain foods i just can't have at home. Hopefully one of these days i can learn to deal with them.

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  2. Good idea, trying to live in the same world as chocolate and stay on plan is a good idea and as a back up plan, banish the chocolate. Seems to me you have a plan to succeed either way. Good on you
    Dawn

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  3. It will take me awhile to live in the world of chocolate again, but I will. You are so smart and you're doing great.

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  4. since we can't have milk, and the only vegan chocolate I can find tastes like chocolate bunnies, chocolate is not an issue here. Now my vegan chocolate cake doesn't last through the party, so it isn't made in between birthdays.

    Just pretend the treats that people bring you are made with lard and you'll get sick if you eat it!

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